So, I know you all have long awaited the details. WARNING: It IS detailed. π You know me…..After all, this is my journal. I can post what I want, right?
Such a beautiful baby! Evan Nathaniel England joined our family Monday, November 15th at 9:14pm. He was 7lbs 3oz and 20″ long.
I woke up around 3am with regular contraction that, while light, were growing stronger and beginning to last longer. After a bit to make sure this was the “real thing” I called mom and got her on her way…Then called Jasmine and Allison, the midwives. They of course had to arrange for childcare, etc. and so didn’t leave until around 7-ish. They arrived around 10:20am and Mom arrived with Paule and Heather (my 2 little sisters) around 10:45 or so. Up until that point I know I had been holding back a bit. Once they were all here my contractions began in earnest. Tam and Tony (sister and brtoher-in-law) came about an hour later. I was in the tub at point and later began to feel the urge to push. I couldn’t believe it! I began pushing probably around 2 or so. Ann was on her way from OKC at this point.
Jasmine did a vaginal exam and we discovered that my uterus was retroverted. In other words, my cervix had slipped behind the baby’s head and so I had only dilated to a 5! I had been feeling the urge to push because I had enough room in my pelvis that the baby’s head had actually dropped to a plus 4 station. (Plus 5 station, one inch lower in the birth canal, is OUT!) So despite the pressure and how low he was I had to stop pushing which was extremely frustrating. I was SO disappointed in myself at this point. They had me climb out of the tub and gave me an herbal tonic to help me relax. I laid in the bed with Sidney for awhile trying to recover my spirits and the midwives had everyone leave us alone for awhile. Sidney was awesome…extremely supportive and emotionally calming to me. He just kept telling me that I COULD do this, that we would find a position that would work well for me and everything was going to be ok, soon we would be holding our baby. It’s what I needed to hear at that point.
Allison checked me again on the bed. Actually she had to find my cervix, bring it into the proper place, line up the baby’s head properly (his head was cocked slightly to one side making it harder for my cervix to stay in position) and then she continued basically holding my cervix in place through several contractions to find what position would put the pressure on my cervix so it would continue opening up, instead of slipping behind the baby’s head. As I look back on it now I realize how blessed I was to have a midwife who was willing to there and DO that! Most doctors would have labeled it as “failure to progress” and tried to tell me my uterus was “insufficient” or “dysfunctional” and tried to give me a C-sec. But the midwives never once even hinted that I wouldn’t be bale to do it….just that we needed to figure out what would work best for ME and MY body.
So by 5 oclock or so (these time are so rough estimate since I totally and completely lost track of time) we had found the best position and my cervix was right in line with the baby’s head at 5 cm. Paper thin cervix…and now my contractions were able to work to OPEN the way, instead of not accomplishing anything. I made terrific progress from that point on. When I was at about 8 cm I again, felt the urge to push and also felt an amazing amount of pressure. My bag of water was very thick and strong because of the good nutrition I had received during my pregnancy. It would bulge ahead into the birth canal during each contraction triggering the urge to push once again.
After some consultation and praying we decided it would be best to break the bag of water. We did so around 8pm…maybe a little after, I don’t know. I decided to move to the tub and when I stood I had several contractions in an upright position and then actually got sick to my stomach…..By this time I was well into 9 centimeters and ready to get back into the tub. Got to the tub and got back in “my position” with all my weight supported by my incredible husband.
Soon I was feeling like I needed to push again and after a quick check to make sure my cervix was REALLY out of the way, I was told it would be alright to push. HURRAY! At LAST I had some small sense of control….I had something to do besides just LET it happen to me. (Perhaps that was what God was trying to teach me??? Allison told me near the beginning that birth requires absolute surrender and you guys know me well enough to know that for me, it is a tough thing. It was true….I had to get to the point where I was truly crying out to God…”I can’t do this myself. I can’t do this, but You can.” NOT easy)
Evan was born after only 30 minutes of pushing. The average first time mom goes at least 2 hours in the pushing stage. He was born in the birthing pool with his Daddy right behind me, supporting me through the whole things. I did not get an episiotomy and did not tear any muscle tissue at all. I had a slight tear of the skin layer in my vagina but no tearing of the perineum. It did not even require a single stitch. (Thank you Lord!)
Moved from the tub to the bed and delivered the placenta. Checked all the baby stuff, nursed him, checked mommy’s bottom, etc….all the post birthing stuff you have to do. and by this time it had been probably 2 hours or more since I had used the restroom last. And I drank a LOT during labor. So when I actually did stand up to go to the restroom I made it as far as the bathroom sink and passed out. Not my usually fainting spells (for those of you who know me and my tendencies) but rather blackouts triggered by pressure on the vegel (sp?) nerve due to a full bladder and stretched out pelvic floor. (all those muscle which usually support were, of course, stretched out from the birth). I passed out twice more while sitting on the toilet (also an unsupported position) so Allison had me move to the tub where I would be supported underneath. She told me if I passed out again in the tub she would give me a catheter to relieve the pressure. She also gave me a small dose of pitocin to help my uterus contract faster and get out of the way of my bladder. I saw the needle and went! **laughing** I teased her that she scared the pee out of me with the needle but I still got the shot. With my bladder empty and my uterus continuing to contract out of the way I was back to “normal” Or as normal as I can be.
Or rather, as normal as I can be after having just given birth to baby with a 13 3/4″ head! Which, by the way, was not “conehead” looking or misshapen at ALL. But anyway, it was again another case of Allison and Jasmine giving me a chance to remedy the situation in a less invasive manner which I was incredibly grateful for. (Catheters are YUCKY and my poor bottom had enough damage just from the stretching out anyway!) At the same time I felt very good knowing that they were able and prepared to use more invasive treatments if the proved to be absolutely necessary. It’s not like they weren’t ABLE…Most medical doctors wouldn’t have even given me a chance. Just like most medical doctors would not have applied counter pressure for 30 minutes of pushing the way Jasmine did for me. She personally thought it was a little weird because in HER labors she never wanted to be touched. But I found it very helpful to have something to direct my pushing towards. It was also at this stage that Tamara was very helpful to me…gently propping my shoulders forward and reminding me to keep my chin down while pushing. Ann reminded me to use my sounds silently and direct it towards the push. The “little girls” (ages 8 and 10) but did great and though it was very cool to be there to see him be born. Mom commented that it seemed like a full house to her but I LOVED having my loved ones all around. It kept me centered and helped anchor me.
In the end the best part was being able to curl up with my WHOLE family (all three of us) in my OWN bed and get up to use my OWN restroom. We have had a lovely week of just getting to know Evan without having to pack up, drive home, unpack, set up, etc. No worries! It’s been a fantastic week and I can’t wait to see how he continues to grow and develop. What a way to start life! Born into your own home with so much love all around. It isn’t an experience I would trade for all the world. It is the hardest thing I have ever done, but I would do it again in a heartbeat.
Angela <><
From: nsu_ra
Date: November 21st, 2004 08:03 pm (UTC)
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Wow … wish I could have been there, sweetie. Can’t wait to meet your new little man!! Love you!
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From: faithbookqueen
Date: November 23rd, 2004 10:26 am (UTC)
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Well…
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He can’t wait to meet his Aunt Crystal and find out who in world was talking such crazy talk last month (actually…come to think of it right about one month before he was born.)! No wonder he decided to hide out ofr another month! **laughing**
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From: calcgoddess1183
Date: November 21st, 2004 08:12 pm (UTC)
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wow…..
sounds like you had quite a day! Did it hurt a lot? (I know, dumb question), but, were you in lots of pain or were you just too exhausted to think about pain? That part about your cervix being behind the baby’s head sounds painful as well. (well, not painful, just hard to picture)
I am glad you were able to deliver Evan the regular way, without a c-section. Both my brother (he’s 30 now) and I were delivered by c-section and the scars on my mom’s stomach are still visible to this day. Though I don’t plan on having children, I admire a woman who can go through childbirth without too much trauma. It sounds like God was really protecting you that day.
And also, what does the birthing pool do? Like, how is it better for a baby to be born in a birthing pool? (just curious)
And, most of all, I think it is awesome that Evan was born the day after my birthday!
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From: faithbookqueen
Date: November 23rd, 2004 10:21 am (UTC)
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Answers to your questions….
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It didn’t HURT like you think of menstrual cramps or anything (of course I used to get cramps so bad I’d bein bed for three days sometimes). THOSE were painful. The hardest thing about this was just the sheer amount of pressure as he moved down and out, and then of course the frustration factor that there was absolutely NOTHING I(emphasis on the _I_) could do to speed the process up. It was going to happen in God’s timing. That’s ALWAYS been a hard thing for me to except.
The only truly painful part was at the very, very end when he actually was about to come out. You’ll hear women describe the stinging sensation as a “ring of fire” and they are NOT kidding! But it’s the very last part, lasts for two pushes (one next time with a non-firstborn child) and then BOOM (it is that quick once the head is out)….you have a baby and you forget all about it.
Now for the second paragraph….MOST woman are able to give birth without too much trauma. Well over 30% of the C-secs done in America are totally unecessary. This is according to the American Obstertics Whatever-the-National-Governing-Body-is-called-I-can’t-remember-right-now. I can find the exact statistic for you if you are interested. There are some doctors/midwives who view childbirth as a natural occurance that women’s body’s have been doing for thousands of years and their rates are often as alow as 3-5% C-secs…in other words only those mothers who TRULY need one get one. On the other hand the state wide average in Texas is now nearly 50%. 50%!!!!!! According to the American Whatever Council the Csec rate SHOULD be as low as 10%. And that’s according to a bunch of male doctors. *wink*
So rest assured. I never needed a Csec. I just needed a little bit of time with someone who was experienced in helping women birth their babies to find what would work best for my body. My uterus was not dysfunctional and I was NOT “failing to progress”. I just needed someone to help. Which is what midwife means…it’s literal translation is “with woman”. I was just making the point that in a hospital situation the subject probably would have some up….even though I was perfectly healthy and the baby was perfectly healthy.
The birthing pool is great. The water helps equlaize some of the pressure making contractions easier, it also gives the baby a warm, comfortable environment to be born into. It also helps relax the perineum muscles in the mother making it MUCH less likely for her to tear. Obviously it is a personal choice and I don’t know that I would deliver all my children in the pool…it was just what sounded best to me at the time. The other thing it allowed was for me to easily lean back and rest against Sidney’s shoulder (he was in the tub at this point) between contractions, and then move easily into a good pushing position with each contraction. I would just lean forward a little bit and Sidney would tip me into a more upright position. Moving around in the water was much easier.
I’m glad you asked questions….I definately do not mind answering them and one thing about me you’ll learn pretty quick…ask an honest answer and you will get an honest answer…maybe TOO honest, but honest none-the-less. *grin* The other thing you can be sre of is that on many of these subjects I have done a lot (a LOT) of personal reading and research so if you ask an honest question you just might get a lot more of an answer than you wanted. **laughing**
Angela <>
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From: calcgoddess1183
Date: November 23rd, 2004 11:34 am (UTC)
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Re: Answers to your questions….
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thank you for answering and for not being embarrassed! I’m really interested in other people’s experiences with things, and having a baby is a pretty big deal. I like people who are open and honest also, if you have any questions about me, my life, my journal, feel free to ask! I would love to answer any questions you have.
I figured the pool sounds better than lying on a bed or table giving birth. If I ever did give birth to a child I might have to look into something like that. I have this problem with my lungs that prevents me from breathing well while on my back. If I lie on my back for more than a couple of minutes I start to feel suffocation.
Do you think women really need an epidural during childbirth? I would really like your opinion on that.
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From: faithbookqueen
Date: November 25th, 2004 11:03 am (UTC)
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Re: Answers to your questions….
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Obviously I do NOT think women NEED an epidural since I just had a baby without one. There are a few (very few) circumstances in which they are necessary however for the most part it’s a matter of convenience and they usually subject you and your baby to unecessary risks. Even with an epidural (which many doctors will tell you won’t effect the baby at all) a measureable drop in the infants hearbeat rate can be detected within five minutes. So…no I do not think women really need one.
Angela <>
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From: melissadee45
Date: November 22nd, 2004 07:19 am (UTC)
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calcogoddess just asked all the questions I had!LOL! Thank God I have an awesome “sister in law” to be there for me when I have my babies! Yay!! And Lord knows Tony and I will need you two there at least on the phone if nothing else!LOL! Any trip scheduled thus far up here? I get to buy baby Christmas stuff now!! Woohoo! Evan’s gonna be so spoiled!!
Mel
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From: faithbookqueen
Date: November 23rd, 2004 10:23 am (UTC)
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Huge reply above
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Well, I am NOT going to retype it all so you’ll just have to stop by LJ and check out my response. *teasing grin*
I love you too sweetie-bee and you BET I’ll be there to support you when your time comes! Evan IS going to be spoiled rotton….he has more Aunts and Uncles than you can imagine.
I’ll be sure to let you know next time we head that direction. I know at some point Sidney wants to go to his parents house and get some firewood. If so I KNOW we’ll have to stop by or else Anita will never forgive us. π
We’ll keep you posted.
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(no subject) – aatraa
From: faithbookqueen
Date: November 23rd, 2004 10:24 am (UTC)
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Yep
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Hurray for us strong athletic woman who can get down to business and get it done!! **laughing**
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(no subject) – ken_sucks
From: faithbookqueen
Date: November 23rd, 2004 10:28 am (UTC)
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**laughing**
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You would have gone crazy Mr. Make-everything-better. My midwife was teasing my brother in law that while the husband feels HELPLESS (to not be able to make anything “better”) any other men just feel USELESS. **laughing** At least Sidney got to help me out and support me, etc. Poor Tony just sat there out of the way, hidden in the corner where he wouldn’t see anything he shouldn’t see. hehehehehe
You guys are welcome anytime, you know that already. I don’t think we are planning any huge trips for awhile, so just let us know.
Angela <>
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From: youranna
Date: November 22nd, 2004 02:41 pm (UTC)
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Go girl!
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Hey GIrl! you did SO good! I’m so excited for you and sidney…that’s for sharing the story…it was cool to read.
I Love you SO much! Give Evan aa kiss for me!!
Can’t wait to see him!!
~Joanna
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From: faithbookqueen
Date: November 23rd, 2004 10:30 am (UTC)
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Re: Go girl!
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Thanks!! We DID do so good. hehehehe I heard your dad used us as an example during a sermon on Sunday. Mom couldn’t remember what all he said right when we were talking about it but then she was chasing kids down to get ready for bed. *grin*
Come visit! Maybe after the New Year before school starts back up for everybody you guys could caravan down.
Angela <>
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From: sweetspirit
Date: November 23rd, 2004 11:25 am (UTC)
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YAY, I got to be there for all of that, and hold my nephew, and be with his awesome mommy and daddy. It was awesome to get to be there for you all. I’m so glad I chose to come and didn’t let the distance or the rain detour me from being there, and I’m thankful I had a work place that was flexible enough to let me off at the absolute last minute… another reason I still love working at Rose the best!!
I love you!! and am so proud of you and Sid, you both displayed how awesome of parents you are in one of the first big milestones of your sons life!
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From: faithbookqueen
Date: November 25th, 2004 11:06 am (UTC)
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YAY
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I’m glad you got to be there too.
Love you girl….
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From: alienspy
Date: November 24th, 2004 07:40 am (UTC)
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Congratulations, Angela! In case you don’t recognize me, this is Julie (alienspy) from Nervousness! I hadn’t been to the Nness forums in over a month and today I had the urge to check if you or Nymphette had given birth yet! I found the link to your Live Journal and here I am! I’m so happy to see that things went well and giving birth at home must have been such an incredible experience… Wow! π Your little guy is adorable! xox
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From: faithbookqueen
Date: November 25th, 2004 11:06 am (UTC)
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Thanks!!!
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Glad you wondered into my livejournal and if you don’t mind, I’m going to add you to my friends list! π
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From: alienspy
Date: November 25th, 2004 01:32 pm (UTC)
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Re: Thanks!!!
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Of course I don’t mind! I’ll add you too! π